2/25/2023 0 Comments Tomb raider angelina jolieTragically, her papa, played by real-life dad Jon Voight, died when she was eight, leaving her to a lonely life of raiding tombs and kicking mythical, monstrous ass. But she is actually Lady Lara Croft, the English daughter of the fabulously wealthy English adventurer Lord Richard Croft (have they checked these titles with Debrett's?). Technically she's supposed to be a "photojournalist": a brilliant job which sadly doesn't exist in real life. There's no disempowering cleavage, and in any case, the movie has to make it into the American PG-13 category, and our 12 certificate - which, in view of Lara, chief censor Andreas Whittam Smith has publicly pondered abolishing. Huge breasts monolithically immobile, as if encased in some new brand of hi-tech assault sports bra. Lips big and smouldering like a fire-damaged Dali sofa. Lara more or less flattens it!Īnyway, Lara Croft is the super-sexy Bondified heroine, and Angelina Jolie's formidable sexuality has been carefully packaged for the cyber-role made flesh. Incredibly, much of this film is set in Cambodia's Angkor Wat: that exquisite, magnificent wonder of the world. Lara goes in blasting with a couple of sleek automatic handguns she's only interested in tombs with mythical beasts lying in wait to protect their zillion-year-old treasures, and it's a rare old tomb that isn't reduced to rubble by the time Lara's through with it. Lara has no truck with the wussy business of whisking bits of dust away from inscriptions with brushes, and there's no nonsense about heritage preservation orders. Lara does not share Indiana Jones's occasional donnish bent. Lara is not a Tomb Studier, or a Tomb Analyser.
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